PROM ADVICE FOR MUSLIMAHS
***Please note: This is just my personal opinion and experience as a Muslimah who grew up in the United States. I know that proms can be entirely different all over the world. My high school prom was a typical US prom and I didn’t have friends with similar beliefs so I personally decided not to go. This post is intended for girls who attend high schools with kids that might be pressuring them to do something they are against.
If you know your Prom is not going to be crazy and that there are no people with crazy intentions, by all means, have fun and be safe. Enjoy the last bits of high school you have left and make amazing memories.
Okay……..so it’s that time of the year when high schoolers rejoice that the semester is soon to be over and their dreams of prom will come true. Now while everyone is picking out their dresses, figuring out limo rides, and asking each other to the dance,….
……what is a Muslim girl to do?
I have conflicted feelings about prom, honestly. I don’t understand why parents would send their kids off to participate in an event that promotes crazy activities. In my opinion, an event that could involve drugs, alcohol, and sex is an event that no Muslim should participate in. I do understand that prom is a celebration of surviving high school and is fun because everyone gets to dress up. However, I think there are better ways to enjoy the last few weeks of school.
Overall, the decision to go to prom should be on a case by case basis. Some proms are filled with kids that mean no harm and just want to spend the last portion of their high school having innocent fun with their friends.
But let’s be real, guys.
The reason a lot of high schoolers are excited for prom is because it is their first night of freedom. If you look up the urban dictionary definition of prom (click here for the link), you will see what it is truly about.
I personally did not show up to my prom because I felt that I had no business there and honestly, I was a total wallflower during my high school years 😀 so there was no peer pressure at all, thankfully. I went to a very big high school with approximately 630+ students in my graduating class. A good number of them were from wealthy and possibly stricter families so getting drugs and alcohol was not a problem and very desired. Because of my high school situation, I felt that the best decision for me was to avoid the event altogether.
If you are a high school Muslimah looking for advice regarding prom or even a relative/guardian/friend who knows someone that is considering to go, here is my prom advice for Muslimahs:
If you know that your prom will have drugs, alcohol, etc. please make the right decision for yourself.
If you have friends that have similar attitudes and morals, go have fun with them. Go shopping for modest clothes, get your makeup done together, and enjoy the process. Just don’t get pushed into hanging out with people that will make you uncomfortable.
Here is a link to modest outfit ideas by themuslimgirl.com
On that note, here are 6 reasons why I personally don’t think Prom is worth it. This is just an opinion from a girl who was born and raised in the United States. If your Prom is a different situation, then don’t worry about it.
6 EXCUSES NOT TO GO TO PROM
1. PROM IS PLANNED CHAOS
I remember overhearing discussions from my classmates about who was going to bring the alcohol, the drugs, and the condoms.
Gross.
What a sad way to lose your mind and your virginity….all in one night.
As a Muslim girl, why would I want to get caught up in that mess? My morals definitely do not correlate with these activities! I would rather get together with my best friends and have fun in a better setting. And even if you don’t have friends or family to hang out with, there are better ways to spend that time with yourself.
The Monday after my Prom, there were missing students because they were still recovering from their hangovers. In addition, two kids from my school were caught doing coke lines in the bathroom.
That’s insane!!!!! Was it really worth it when they lost their full rides to Ivy League schools?
2. PROM IS EXPENSIVE
Paying for prom is like paying for a miniature wedding.
Honestly, don’t you think this money can be better spent on college expenses?
(You’ll thank me in a few months haha)
Here is a list of common expenses people pay for when they go to prom :
– Limousine
– Dress
– Makeup
– Hair
– Entry Ticket
– Photos
– Dinner
– After Prom Hotel or Beach House
3. IS PROM “FUN?”
Obviously, I wouldn’t know from personal experience because I never went, but the common testimonial from many sources seems to be that “it wasn’t worth it.”
Here is what happens at prom according to the people I’ve spoken to:
1. You stand there looking pretty watching people dance
2. No one eats the food. The ticket you paid for covers it, but everyone has gone to dinner before the event. (If I was at Prom, I would definitely be hanging out at the buffet table haha)
3. The deeper you go into the dance floor, the raunchier it gets. There will literally be people grinding against one another LOL.
4. Your teachers will be there….watching everything.
4. AFTER PROM
During the actual “Prom” event, let’s just say that the action going on is NOTHING compared to what happens after 😀 …..at the After Prom!
Again, I don’t know this from personal experience. This is just what I’ve heard from friends and read from the internet. Apparently during this time period there is a lot of clubbing, drinking, nudity, and other gross stuff going on at hotels and beach houses.
Sounds like fun, right?
5. IT’S ONLY ONE DAY
I understand that the peer pressure and the hype might push you to consider going to Prom. Just know that after you are handed your diploma, you won’t even see most of your fellow students ever again. Also, no one really talks about prom afterwards. I have yet to see a person pull out a prom photo from their wallet and tells everyone how great it was.
6. THERE ARE OTHER CRAZY WAYS TO CELEBRATE THE END OF HIGH SCHOOL
1. Go to the gun range.
Imagine coming back to school and telling everyone that while they were out getting crunk, you learned how to shoot bad guys :D.
2. Go on crazy rides at a nearby water or theme park.
If adrenaline is your thing, water parks and theme parks are a better option than awkward prom. With all of the money you have saved on not going, you can splurge on getting fast pass tickets to avoid lines!
Also, parks provide better Instagram opportunities :D. This can help you prove to your friends and everyone else that you are not missing out.
3. Have your own crazy party.
Seriously, just blast your favorite music and dance like crazy. You worked hard for that diploma! You can do this with friends but I personally like to crank out my moves when I am alone in the house haha!
In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with being friends with people who do not have the same beliefs as I do. However, I do think there is a point in which you must draw a line.
If you are prone to peer pressure, please please please don’t put yourself in this position by going to prom with people you know will go crazy. Don’t let everyone tell you that its okay to do things you aren’t comfortable with. The 16-18 age range is still very young and most kids at this period in their lives have unresolved issues with confidence, self-esteem, etc. Remember that the decisions you make will follow you for the rest of your life. Don’t ruin yourself for one night. There are plenty of ways for you to enjoy your life.
I have heard so many stories of Muslims who get caught up in the mess. Please don’t let that happen to you. High school should end with a happy note, not a regretful one.
***Note: Again, if your Prom is going to be a different story, then don’t worry.
Make sure to leave comments or questions!!! 😀 I would love to know your perspectives!
Also, here is a link to a more comedic take on prom for Muslims by Dr. O on Muslimmedicine.net 😀
http://muslimmatters.org/2012/04/04/a-muslims-guide-to-rejecting-prom-dates/